IF YOU ASK MITT ROMNEY WHAT TIME IT IS...

If you ask Mitt Romney what time it is, he'll look at his watch, tell you how pleased he is that it's an American watch, probably recite a few lines from some American patriotic songs, then tell you that in Europe they've destroyed the notion of linear time, and if Barack Obama has his way we'll be just like Europe, with utterly useless watches and a completely skewed sense of the hour of the day.

He'll probably never tell you what time it is.