Wednesday, October 19, 2016


I know I shouldn't be an arrogant East Coast elitist whose image of Deep Red America is based on clichés -- but some news stories, like this one from northwest Florida (you know, the part that's due south of Alabama and Georgia), make those clichés seem awfully close to the truth:
Gun disappears after being used as wedding prop

An AR-15 that was used as a photo prop for a Saturday wedding in Laurel Hill was taken from the owner's vehicle over the weekend.

The Crestview man told Okaloosa County Sheriff's Office deputies that he left his car unlocked for a period of time during the event....
To be fair, the wedding photographer says it's the first time he's ever seen a firearm used as a wedding-photo prop. But where I come from, there'd never be a first time -- the use of an assault weapon in wedding photos just wouldn't happen. I guess that means these northwest Floridians are Real Americans and we're not.

This story was found at Free Republic, where you regularly see this graphic:


Victor said...

That poor gun looks tired after jacking-off to the Bible and the flag, and leaving its bullets like spent seed by a guy yankin'-it to Penhouse!

Professor Chaos said...

We've driven through that part of Florida a few times on our way to the beach and I must say I am not surprised at all.

BKT said...

I remember when the Righties would be freaking out over the most basic misuse or improper display of the American flag-- "Disrespectful! You should be ashamed!"

According to the U.S. Flag code, under section §176. "Respect for flag":

The flag should never be drawn back or bunched up in any way.

The flag should never be fastened, displayed, used, or stored in such a manner as to permit it to be easily torn, soiled, or damaged in any way.

When the flag is lowered, no part of it should touch the ground or any other object; it should be received by waiting hands and arms. To store the flag it should be folded neatly and ceremoniously.

One would think that those Freepers would take exception to that graphic. But that would also assume they have internally consistent logic...

The New York Crank said...

The gun is next to the Bye-bul and on top of the 'mercian flag because it says right there in the Bye-bul, somewhere, that 'mericans should arm themselfs. And don't go askin' me no trick questions like what chapter and verse. You go open a Bye-bul and find it for your lazy libtard self.

Yours very crankily,
The New York Crank

Kathy said...

Hey! I'm soon to be a northwest Floridian (too bad I'm not already registered to vote here, as it would mean a lot more than my Alabama vote), and I'd never have a gun as a prop for anything. We're not all crazy down here. :-)

homelessonthehighdesert said...

I remember a time not so awful long ago when someone wearing the flag as an article of clothing or a sweat rag wrapped around someone's greasy head would result in an ass kicking.

The flag in that photo has been so besoiled it needs to be properly desposed of, per the aforementioned US Code of Uniform Justice burned. Use that wad of toilet paper to light the fire.

I'm not fond of burning books,
Ten Bears

Dark Avenger said...

TB, the book can be useful in an outhouse or W.C..

homelessonthehighdesert said...

Brings to mind a bit of the best Oregon Literature ever: Sometimes a Great Notion, of Indian Jenny, a character central to the story, who faithfully read one page, both sides, of her yearly missionary donated "book" every morning down at the outhouse behind her house out on the edge of the clamflats... before putting it to more practical use.

Don't hear "water closet" very often
Ten Bears