TED NUGENT TURNS EVERY FOX NEWS TALKING POINT INTO BEAT POETRY ON TWITTER

Nobody's ever confused the guy who gave us "Wang Dang Sweet Poontang" with Bob Dylan or Phil Ochs, much less Allen Ginsberg or Jack Kerouac -- but when Ted Nugent senses injustice, he can write angry protest poetry with the best of them. People have been criticizing him for calling the president a "subhuman mongrel," and you'd think a guy as tough as Nugent thinks he is would just let that criticism roll off his back -- but it hurts, man! It's causing Nugent existential pain!

So he's taken to the modern-day equivalent of an Eisenhower-era coffeehouse -- Twitter -- and posted his own beat poem of outrage, consisting of every Fox News talking point of the last five years, each one linked to a phrase that, when repeated, is incantatory in its power and early-Dylanesque in its rage. Cats and kitties, dig it:










Here's how you have to imagine this being read:





Nugent's poem ... it's almost Joycean. Some would argue that his repeated failure to put a space in the conjoined word "offensivethan" is a lazy rageoholic's failure to cut and paste properly. But say it out loud -- of-fen-SI-ve-than. It's wordplay worthy of Finnegans Wake, an evocation of the Leviathan, a word it almost vaguely sounds like. And "Obamaswatch" in the last line? That's clearly a reference to the Swatch watches of the now departed Golden Age of Reagan.

Yeah, this is deep. I hope you squares can handle it.