REPUBLICANS SCREW THE POOCH AND DEMOCRATS BEAT THEMSELVES UP

Because we have preposterously long presidential campaigns in America, I think it's understable that politicians who want to run for president in 2028 are already campaigning. But please note how a likely Republican candidate is beginning his campaign, and how several Democrats are doing the same thing. Note in particular that the Republican -- who's part of an administration that's failing in every conceivable way, and is massively unpopular as a result -- isn't engaging in self-reflection or self-doubt at all. The candidates who are sniping at their own party are the ones who didn't plunge us into a failed war of choice, aren't presiding over skyrocketing energy prices, aren't defending brutal secret-police tactics in America's streets, and aren't turning airport security into the lowest circle of Hell.

Here's an NBC News story showing us how J.D. Vance is preparing to run for president:

Second lady Usha Vance on Friday ... sat down with NBC News for a 30-minute interview in her new studio ahead of the launch of her podcast, “Storytime With the Second Lady,” which premieres Monday.

And what's the nature of this podcast?

“It’s a podcast that really is just for children. The notion is we will have someone come in — a special reader, we’re calling them — read a fun book, have a very short little conversation about things related to the book, maybe about their career, if they have some sort of interesting background,” Vance said. “And then invite children to pick up books on their own. It’s sort of just an advertisement for reading.”

Usha Vance is a Yale-educated lawyer, but they're positioning her as a tradwife, with three children -- and one on the way! As with most online tradwives, she'll create the illusion that she's focused exclusively on motherly duties, even though podcasting is actually a job. The plan is to make her a warm presence in the lives of voters, especially female voters. Even the labor of creating a podcast is portrayed as housewife-y:

The second lady said her children helped with the design and decor of her podcast studio, where she’ll record episodes of the show.

This is how you run for president as a Republican: Even if most of the country thinks you and your party are failing, you proceed as if millions of people really like you and like your party (which, sadly, is true), and you concentrate on trying to get more people to like you.

That's not how Democrats operate. Ambitious Democrats believe that the key to success is beating up on your own party, even at a moment when we're being ruled by the worst president in American history, a member of the opposition party. So here's Cory Booker:

Cory Booker, the Democratic senator from New Jersey, renewed his calls for new leadership of the Democratic party, saying the party has “failed this moment”.

“As a whole, our party has failed this moment,” Booker said on Sunday. “I’ve called for a generational renewal, because this left-right divide is killing our country and our adversaries know it.” He also said that “purity tests” within the party have led to more division in the US.

During an interview on NBC’s Meet the Press, Booker also said the Democratic party has “too small of a coalition”, especially as the party seeks to confront “new challenges”, including Trump administration policies and the expansion of artificial intelligence and technology.

Booker was critical of President Trump in that interview -- but at this moment, why should you beat up your own party, too? It's as if Booker has misunderstood the old James Carville line: When your opponent is drowning, throw him an anvil. Booker seemingly wants to add: And jump in with one yourself. (To be fair, Carville these days is no better.)

Then we have Elissa Slotkin on Bill Maher's show a couple of days ago:

Elissa Slotkin: You're not going to get me to defend democratic messaging. We can have a whole autopsy about that.

Whether you're a Democrat or Republican, the American people want something different out of their government. Can we have a little bit more alpha energy? pic.twitter.com/h8li6EAbmq

— Blue Georgia (@BlueGeorgia) March 28, 2026

She begins:

You're not going to get me to defend Democratic messaging. That's not going to be ever something that I'm going to defend. That's part of the problem and why we lost the last election. We can have a whole autopsy about that.

I complain about Democratic messaging all the time, but I'm a blogger with a small readership. I'm not a U.S. senator on a nationally televised TV show. This is not the place to agree with Republicans about how much Democrats suck. It's not the place to be a pick-me -- Yes, my party is awful, but I'm not like the other Democrats.

The rest of this plays into throwback stereotypes of masculinity and femininity -- it's essentially saying that other Democrats are big fags and we need some Democrats who aren't:

I think, for me, what is important, going forward, whether you're a Democrat or Republican, is like: the American people, they're telling us something, they want something different out of their government. They want, they want some alpha energy from their leaders. And they certainly — whether you agree with them or not — are getting that from some of the Republicans. And my plea to my own party is, like, can we have a little bit more alpha energy? Punch and believe in what we believe in and show people that we give a shit, and be simple about addressing the needs that they care about the most. And that has been a struggle, and I'm here to be a part of that change.

It's not likely to work. When a woman says that prominent Democrats (who are mostly male) are effeminate, she's reinforcing an ugly idea on the right that Democratic men are effectively women and Democratic women are really men.

And Democrats don't need to do this. Sure, 1992 Bill Clinton and 2008 Barack Obama had bro appeal, but did anyone think they could kick a tough guy's ass? They weren't muscular and aggressive. They persuaded voters that they "give a shit ... about addressing the needs that they care about the most," but that's the opposite of "alpha energy," which is largely about not caring what anyone else wants or needs.

And then we have another pick-me, Rahm Emanuel:



Here's how the clip begins:

IAN BREMMER: If you look ahead to 2028 for a second, if you're the Democrats, what's the most likely way they blow it (Rahm and audience laughing)

RAHM EMANUEL: Being Democrats. (audience laughing and applauding)

Which is shorthand for Democrats are fixated on trans people, even though that isn't true, and even though trans rights weren't a salient issue in last year's gubernatorial elections in Virginia and New Jersey, which Democrats won in blowouts.

EMANUEL: We spent two years communicating with people that we were worried about bathroom access and locker room access, and we never focused on classroom excellence.

In a Politico profile, Emanuel culturally stereotypes Democrats as if he's working with Greg Gutfeld's writers:

“I’m not into Democrats sitting on the 30th floor of a Manhattan highrise in their Lululemon outfit with their Yeti cup, talking about, ‘We should go to places that we don’t go’ and then never go,” Emanuel told me before embarking on this trip. “So I don’t talk about it, and I’m just gonna go.”

Dude, you are talking about it. (We're later treated to a scene of Emanuel on a factory floor. Apparently he thinks he's the only Democrat in the 21st century who's ever visited one.)

Stop doing this. Stop echoing Republican messaging about Democrats. Don't be Andy Beshear saying,

The Democratic Party at different times has talked at and not to people. It’s even talked down to people, which is wrong. Our words have to have meaning.

If you're pressed to denounce your party, ask whether your interviewer will demand that Vance or Marco Rubio denounce theirs.

It's Republicans who are losing winnable elections now. Reporters should ask them why their party is failing.