I liked Hart Seely's "Poetry of D.H. Rumsfeld" in Slate. Here's my attempt:

"He's either dead, or he's incapacitated, or he's healthy and cowering in some tunnel someplace trying to avoid being caught. What else can one say?" Rumsfeld said.

--CNN

He's either dead, or
he's incapacitated, or
he's healthy and

cowering in
some tunnel
someplace
trying to

avoid being
caught. What

else can
one say?