DICTATOR TRUMP MIGHT BE A FASCIST MINUTEMAN, IF YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN

Does anyone think Donald Trump is good in bed? As New York magazine's Olivia Nuzzi reported earlier this year, Stormy Daniels says in her memoir that Trump is terrible, the wham-bam-thank-you-ma'am type:

“... There was no foreplay, and it was one position. Missionary....”

It was, she said, among the least impressive “two to three minutes” of her life.

I thought of this when I read Trump's response to Sean Hannity's question about whether a second Trump presidency would be a dictatorship:

“Under no circumstances — you are promising America tonight — you would never abuse power as retribution against anybody?” Hannity asked Trump....

“Except for Day One,” Trump quickly replied....

“Except for Day One. Meaning?” Hannity asked.

“I want to close the border, and I want to drill, drill, drill,” Trump said as the crowd cheered....

Trump then doubled down on his promise to close the U.S.-Mexico border and expand oil drilling on his first day, adding: “After that, I’m not a dictator.”

The New Republic's Matt Ford offers the standard liberal response to this: "Trump Will Be a Dictator on Day One and Every Day Thereafter." But what if that's not true?

Ford is correct to say that people linked to Trump have some extremely authoritarian plans for his second term:

Trumpworld is scheming to install ideological loyalists throughout the federal government, purge the civil service of any dissenters, centralize all power in the executive branch, and unleash the Justice Department on Trump’s perceived political enemies with sham prosecutions.

But Trump might not follow through on some of those plans because, well, he's Donald Trump. In his vertical life, he wants what he seems to want in bed: quick gratification with very little follow-through. (Sex with Stormy Daniels took two or three minutes, she says, and never happened again.)

Trump wants to start a draconian crackdown on immigration on his first day back in office because he hates immigrants and his voters love him for that hatred more than they love him for anything else. He wants to reverse all efforts to move toward a post-fossil-fuels future because, I think, he finds clean energy emasculating. (Many American men seem to feel the same way.)

After that, I'm sure he'll concentrate on ending his legal troubles by stocking the Justice Department with lackeys committed to corruptly serving his needs -- but I'm not sure he'll bother to seek revenge against "disloyal" former underlings, or even against the Biden family. He might just sit in the Oval Office every day (after the usual several hours of morning television) and just react to recent events. I think he's much more likely to spend a typical Tuesday trying to punish CNN for something it broadcast on Monday night than avenging some slight he experienced in 2019.

I could be completely wrong about this -- Trump's allies have plans for the country that seem awfully Khmer Rouge-y, and they don't seem to suffer from Trump's attention deficit disorder. But for many things they'll need his signoff, and their plans might just be a series of fascist Infrastructure Weeks.