GOD IS MY GHOSTWRITER?

Back in the fall, I said that Sarah Palin might go to Rupert Murdoch's Christian book division for her memoir, and that's what she's done, sort of:

You knew it was coming: Sarah Palin is ready to tell her side, agreeing to publish a memoir with HarperCollins. The book comes out in Spring 2010 -- the year she is up for re-election.

...The book will be co-released by the HarperCollins imprint Harper and, for the Christian market, by the HarperCollins-owned Zondervan, which publishes "The Purpose Driven Life" author Rick Warren, among others.

...As he did when arranging a publisher for memoirs by Bush and Clinton, [agent Robert] Barnett did not solicit competing bids, but chose to negotiate only with one publisher, HarperCollins, which Barnett praised for being "first and fervent in pursuing this project."

Well, sure -- partnering with Jesus and Fox News? In hindsight, it's almost unimaginable that Palin could have gone any other way.

My favorite line in the story:

"Every word of the book will be her words," Barnett said.

Oh, if only that were true -- if so, the as-yet-untitled memoir could be called Finnegans Wake: The Sequel, or perhaps An Infinite Number of Moose at an Infinite Number of Typewriters. But no, Palin's going to have a collaborator -- or perhaps "translator" would be a better word.

And yes, she's planning to put the old whine in her new bottle:

"There's been so much written about and spoken about in the mainstream media and in the anonymous blogosphere world, that this will be a wonderful, refreshing chance for me to get to tell my story, that a lot of people have asked about, unfiltered," the Alaska governor and 2008 vice presidential candidate said during a brief telephone interview Tuesday with The Associated Press.

Do you think she even understands that many, many bloggers post under their real names? Do you think she's even aware of that? Do you think she thinks anonymity is a precondition for blogging, or at least blogging that hurts her feelings?

This, by the way, is just silly:

[Harper publisher Jonathan] Burnham said Palin did not submit any writing samples when she met with HarperCollins executives in Washington, earlier this year.

Well, she wouldn't -- she's just going to talk her whole life story into some sort of audio device and someone who can actually construct coherent sentences will have to slash away with a machete at the verbal underbrush and turn what she says into something resembling English-language prose. My heart goes out to that person.

And it will be a big bestseller, because people in Bugtussle will be firmly convinced that every time someone buys a copy the Baby Jesus smiles and a liberal cries.