Wednesday, May 23, 2012

DOES MITT ROMNEY THINK HE'S "THE ONE"?

I'm reading through the Mark Halperin interview of Mitt Romney. Remember the way right-wingers said in 2008 that Barack Obama was acting as if he had supernatural transformational powers? Remember how they said that Obama supporters believed he was just going to magically transform America as a result of his wonderfulness?

Well, I think Mitt Romney thinks he's "The One" now:

Halperin: So a lot of these changes though, the tax and spending changes, kick in January 1. You wouldn't take office until January 20. Does that worry you about what that might do to the economy in terms of confidence, in terms of perception?

Romney: Well actually if I'm lucky enough to be elected the consumers and the small-business people in this country will realize that they have a friend in the White House, who is actively going to encourage economic growth, and there will be a resurgence in confidence in this country and a willingness to take risks, to invest, to add employees. I think it will be very positive news to the American economy.


That's right -- he's going to magically make economic trouble go away weeks before taking office! His aura is going to do it! He's just going to exist, and troubled economic waters will be stilled!

Halperin is asking him about the "fiscal cliff" -- the impending need to raise the debt ceiling, the expiration of the Bush tax cuts, automatic spending cuts that are due to kick in. Romney just says his mere fabulousness will prevent all this from being a problem:

Will I be able to get done between January 1 and January 20 the things that I'd like to do? Of course not, I'm not in office. But I believe that we will be able to have a grace period, which allows us to tackle these issues one by one and put in place a structure, which is very much designed to get America working again.

He's just going to hold economic budgetary problems at bay using his sheer Mitt-ness. Trouble will just sit and wait patiently until he's darn good and ready!

Call Shepard Fairey! Call Will.i.am! Call Oprah! He's definitely the new One!

3 comments:

  1. Or we could save a lot of money and just make a big stone bust of Romney and let the CNBC talking heads lead the chants. O-o-o-o-o-o-m!!!

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  2. The Messiah? I thought he was going to float down out of the heavens on a winged white horse with a thousand sidekicks to carry us all away to paradise (OK, maybe not me). After two-thirds of "Israel" and two-thirds of the "Jewish" population were destroyed. When the blood is as deep as horse's bridle.

    Or aliens. That's right: aliens (you know, from Outer Space) Thousands upon thousands of vast spacecraft piloted by vaguely reptilian creatures... no, wait, that's not it (though Willard does remind me of a hungry lizard).

    Gosh, I'm so confused. I should have go have a glass of Ambien, Prozac, Viagra and crotch-shots on Fox Kool-Aid and turn on the television.

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  3. "Vote for 'Mitt' Romney. 'Catch' the aura!"

    What an arrogant, entitled, motherfecker that asshole is.

    If elected, Mitt'll be the "bane" of America's existence.

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